A year after we started dating, he travelled abroad. The communication never stopped. I would stay up late and talk to him because of the time difference. He promised he was making money so he could marry me. Hearing about marriage made me happy. I told him I couldn’t wait to be his wife. He told me he couldn’t wait to be the father of our children.......CONTINUE READING THE ARTICLE FROM THE SOURCE>>>>>
Two years later, he completed his studies abroad and came back home. The excitement was there again. We were inseparable. He brought gifts for my parents and my siblings. I went to see his parents, I think for the third time, and he announced the marriage plans to them. They were receptive. They prayed for us and said everything was going to be well.
We should have been married last year, but a series of events went against us and disrupted our marriage plans. The idea was to marry in January this year. We were very close to finalizing our plans, but again, it didn’t happen. We scheduled the wedding for May. This time, it’s happening. Nothing will stop us unless one of us dies. Now, I almost wish death would come to me so the marriage won’t happen.
He hasn’t done anything wrong to me. He hasn’t cheated or been abusive. He has done his best—something many men wouldn’t do—but when I look at him and think about forever with him, I feel like it’s not going to work. I’m already bored. The many postponements have taken the excitement out of the wedding for me. I’ve had time to think about marriage and feel like it’s not for me.
I don’t love him like I used to. The butterflies no longer flutter when he talks about marriage. When I’m with him, I can’t wait for time to pass so I can leave or he can leave me alone. I told him nothing would happen between us again until marriage, and he agreed. He thinks I’m reserving what’s left for marriage, but in reality, it’s because sleeping with him has become a chore.
His touch doesn’t affect me like it used to. Nothing actually works, and I want to do him the honour of telling him the truth: that we should call off the wedding entirely or postpone it again. Postponement will make things worse. Calling it off will hurt him deeply. He’s a good man and doesn’t deserve this, but I look into myself and say, “I also don’t deserve a marriage I’m not excited about.”
I Never Paid Fees Again Until I Completed School
I’ve tried looking for a reason to leave. I’ve gone through his phone secretly. I’ve monitored his calls and the people he sends money to. I wanted to find something wrong so I could walk away, but nothing seems out of place. Can I just walk away when nothing is wrong? May is here, but my heart is far away. Will love come back in the morning if I go through with the wedding?
I’m just confused. Is this a normal feeling when you’re close to marriage?
