We broke up five years ago when I was pregnant. He wanted me to let it go. I didn’t know what to do at that time, whether to keep it or let it go. All I asked for was a little bit of time to think about the issue. He kept putting pressure on me every day until out of anger I told him, “I’m having it. Just leave me alone.”.....See Full Story>>.....See Full Story>>
He took it literally and left me alone until the child was born. He came to claim him and did what tradition required him as a father of the child. After that, he sent money when he wanted to and sent an amount he wanted to send. I didn’t complain but along the line, the money stopped coming. I didn’t complain too.
Our child is four years old as I write this. I moved on and started a new relationship that’s going somewhere only for my ex to appear again to sow a seed of discord in my relationship.
I don’t know when he interviewed for a job where I work but one morning, he was introduced to us as our new colleague. I hadn’t seen him in two years. I thought it was a bad dream I would wake up from but it wasn’t. He’s in a different department but in the same office. I detest seeing his face but he has told everyone I’m his baby mama. That aside, he’s talking about coming back into my life “For the sake of our child.”
I couldn’t keep it to myself so as a good girlfriend, I discussed it with my boyfriend: That my ex is working with me and he’s pushing to come back. We talked about it extensively and I assured him that nothing would make me go back to that guy.
My ex has started giving me money for the child. I didn’t hide it. I told my man about it. This is me being transparent. Not knowing I’m rather digging a grave for the relationship. My boyfriend told me, “You’re enjoying his presence that’s why you keep entertaining him. If not, why don’t you resign and look for a new job?”
I thought he had a point so I’ve started looking for a new job but you know a new job doesn’t come easily. He wants me to leave and search. I’m searching so I leave when I get a new one. He thinks it’s my way of cheating with my ex. I have a child I take care of. He’s my boyfriend. It’s not his responsibility to take care of my child. If I resign today, who’s going to take care of us?
I posed this question to him and he thinks I’m making excuses. currently, he has given me an ultimatum to quit or lose him. I can’t do any of the two. I can quit when I get a new job. I don’t want to lose him too because he has been a rock under which I seek emotional refuge.
Many men have turned their backs on me because I have a child. He stayed because he loves me enough to look beyond the fact that I have a child and I know he’s asking me to resign because he doesn’t want to lose me. What should I do to make things work? It’s quite urgent.