I Danced With A Narcissist And Almost Lost Myself

I have never met Marcus in person, yet our relationship has been one power struggle after another. Right from the moment I agreed to give him a chance, he told me he didn’t want a one-sided love affair. He said he didn’t want me to do anything to disrespect him, just because we were a couple. I assured him I wouldn’t.......➡️CONTINUE READING THE FULL ARTICLES HERE.

I was certain that our story would be one of those sweet love stories—the whole “We started with a high on Facebook and now we are living a happily ever after” kind of thing. That’s because we indeed met on Facebook. He reacted to my post and then slid into my Messenger.

Conversations flowed easily from there, and now I am wondering what it is I saw in him that made me think he was the one for me. In my defense, things were not bad at first.

He lives in a different country, so we mainly communicated through WhatsApp calls and video calls. He is ahead of me in time, so he texts me every morning before going to work, and I reply when I wake up.

One thing about me is that I don’t know how to keep quiet when something is bothering me. I will tell whoever offended me, “Oh, I didn’t like what you did. I would appreciate it if you don’t do that again going forward.”

I think this form of communication is good for any kind of relationship, but Marcus hated it. He doesn’t think he does anything wrong, so the fact that I would point out a displeasure to him rubbed him the wrong way. He, on the other hand, had a long list of things I was not doing to please him.

First, he started by saying I made our relationship boring. “Do something to spice things up,” he demanded.

I asked him how, and he said I should send him sexy photos. He said they didn’t necessarily have to be nudes—just photos for him to look at when he thinks of me.

I wanted the relationship to work. What’s wrong with sending my man some photos? He refused to reciprocate the gesture, though, but I didn’t complain.

The next thing he asked was that I should not post any photos I sent him publicly. He said he wanted the photos I sent him to be for his eyes only and that if he saw them online, he would delete his. I complied for the sake of peace.

The more the relationship progressed, the more demands he made. One day, I asked him if he ever considered my feelings and why everything was always about him.

“Today, babe do this. Tomorrow, babe do that. What about what I want?” I told him I felt I was being controlled. “Do you know who a narcissist is?” I asked him.

Instead of listening to me and changing his ways, he said I didn’t love him. He became cold toward me after that. He stopped texting and calling me. This was hard for me, considering the friendship we had formed over the months.

He had become my confidant, so I found the separation hard. For the sake of peace, I apologized to him. I just wanted us to get back to the way things were. This man said he was done and that we should just be friends. “There are women out there who would be happy to be with a man like me. I hope I find someone like that soon,” he said.

He even said I was too old for him to be chasing me. Honestly, I don’t know what I did for this man to make me feel so small. Was it wrong of me to communicate my feelings to him? He just expected me to be in the relationship and do everything he wanted, as if I were a puppet. Usually, men like that give you money, but I never asked this man for a penny. On his own too, he never offered me anything. All he did was make demands.

In the end, I accepted that he was no good for me. I let him go. He said we should remain friends, but I refused.

Now that I have moved on, he’s back in my life again. He says I am a good woman and that he loves me. I shook my head, smiled, and said, “Oh honey, if you were the last man on this earth, I would date a tree.”

I will be damned if I ever let him back into my life to hurt me again. He should go and find himself one of those women he claims are better than me and control. One thing my relationship with him has taught me is that when a narcissist finds it hard to control you, they resort to breaking your spirit, just so you would feel small and remain attached to them.