Why I Won’t Speak to My Father-in-Law Again Until He Apologizes

My boss brought me home one evening because she had kept me in the office all evening to beat deadlines. When I stepped out of her car, my father-in-law was at the gate. I greeted him and entered the house. The next day, when my husband called, he asked who had brought me home and why I had stayed out all evening. According to him, he had called my father-in-law, and I wasn’t home.......CONTINUE READING THE ARTICLE FROM THE SOURCE>>>>>

Another evening, it was very hard to get a trotro home. I called Uber, and I alighted in front of our gate. Again, my father-in-law saw me. When I greeted him, he responded nasally. The next morning, he started giving me attitude. Again, my husband called to ask who had brought me home. I was frustrated, so I asked him to explain my situation very well to his father so he would stop thinking badly about me.

To resolve all that, my husband quickly rented an apartment for me, and I moved in. I had lived with his parents for over five months because we were building our own house and didn’t want to put a lot of money into renting a space. My husband was abroad, had come home to marry me, and then returned.

A few months after leaving his parents’ home, my husband returned from abroad and stayed for over a month. When he was leaving, I suspected I was pregnant, but we couldn’t confirm it until he got there. I did the test and sent him the results. Our first child was on the way—the child who would change our names from husband and wife to parents.

We had a boy, and my husband decided to name him after his father. We had that conversation over the phone. A few days later, when my husband called, he said, “I want us to do a DNA test on the child. Please don’t get me wrong. Just let’s do it for peace’s sake.”

When I pressed him for an explanation, he told me his father said he wouldn’t allow the child to bear his name because he wasn’t sure the child was indeed his grandchild.

I didn’t argue. Even when my husband suggested I should do it myself and bring the results, I told him, “I’m already smelling of shit, and you still want me to fart? Your father can lead the way, and I will follow.”

My father-in-law never visited to see the child because of this suspicion. My mother-in-law came on several occasions. She made excuses for her husband, but I knew what the issue was. My son was eight months old and still didn’t have a name.

My husband finally came home. When we were going to the facility, his father came along. He whispered whenever he had something to say to my husband. My heart was boiling—that a man whom I’d taken as my dad would do such a thing. The DNA test came back positive.

While my husband was smiling and saying, “I knew I was the father,” my father-in-law was staring at a wall. After all this I’ve been through, my husband wants me to go to his father and start building a relationship.

I told him, “I expected him to say sorry after the result, but he never did. He should be the one to build a relationship.” His mom called to ask me to come home. I didn’t go. My mom thinks I should wait for an apology before I go, but my dad is always pushing me to be the bigger person.

I’m here. When he’s ready to get off his high horse and say sorry for accusing me wrongly, I will willingly accept his apology and be that daughter-in-law again. Or I’m pushing it too far?