Aunty Abena, please share my story with your audience to help me know what to do about my boyfriend. I met a young man who is 7 years older than me. He came to see my family for knocking, and they made him aware of my late sister’s son (we were cousins).
My family lost her a few months after delivery, and I was the closest friend she had. At that time, I was financially okay and also married with no child, so I vowed to take good care of the child, and I’m still doing it without the help of any family member. The child’s father is nowhere to be found (he has run away), so I am single-handedly caring for the child.
Fast forward, I left my marriage due to infidelity on the part of my ex-husband. God being so good, I met a young, hardworking man. I told him about my late cousin’s child (now my child) and how my divorce came about, and he had no issues with it.
We started planning for our marriage, and I got pregnant a few months into the relationship. We were both happy, but we lost the baby in the second trimester. We decided to try again, and exactly after 3 months, I got pregnant again. We now have a child together, but we don’t stay together, and he gives us 250gh every week.
To my problem, since my pregnancy was high-risk, we spent a lot on the pregnancy through to childbirth. My husband-to-be is a changed person now; he insults me, calls me a beggar, and complains about expenses. I have spent more than 30,000gh on childbirth alone.
He claims I’m lazy because of my loan deduction, but can a lazy lady build a 3-bedroom apartment without the help of any man? I am very hardworking. Currently, I wake up at 4 am to go about my businesses before returning to my job at 9 am, even though I am a nursing mother.
He is surrounded by several female friends, compares me with them, and complains about my financial burden. Apart from the 250gh, I don’t ask for anything, and I pay 60gh for transportation every weekend. Our baby is almost a year, no intimacy since I gave birth, and he reasons that he doesn’t want to make a mistake of getting me pregnant again. I have decided to opt out of this relationship and not go to his place ever again.
I’m tired of his abusive words. I want to jakpa with my baby and leave my other child (late cousin’s child) with my mom. But are my reasons for breaking up with him valid? Please kindly share your thoughts; I’m hurt and heartbroken, but I pretend as if all is well with me. If I leave, this will be my last because I’m done with relationships; I have smelled pepper. I know God will come through for me. God bless us all and hear our plea. Amen!
Medaase (Thank You).
ADVICE FROM AUNTY ABENA
Dear, it’s clear you’ve faced challenging circumstances, and I admire your strength. In making decisions, prioritize your well-being and that of your children. It might be helpful to have an open conversation with your partner about your feelings and concerns, but if the relationship is causing you distress, it’s okay to prioritize your own happiness. Seek support from friends, family, or professionals if needed. Remember, you deserve to be in a relationship that uplifts and respects you. Take the steps that bring peace and positivity into your life.
